It is rather obvious right now that Thanksgiving has passed. Yet, we need to remember to keep giving thanks for the things that we have. Thus, I would like to give a couple of historical shout-outs to those who made Thanksgiving possible.

1. To the Anglican Church: Thank you for repressing people's religion and making them flee to the New World, leaving us with a rich traditions of persecuting people for their beliefs and standing strong during the Reformation for the theological right to divorce people whenever you so please.
2. To the Pilgrim Separatists: For fleeing to North America so we can kill witches here peaceably and wear shoes with buckles.
3. To the American Indians: When we were starving anyou gave us food and showed us how to prosper in a foreign land. We would like to show you our gratitude by giving you smallpox and taking your lands. 
4. To Andrew Jackson: For giving the American Indians nice little plots of land and then giving them the option to move to other plots of land farther away. 
5. To FDR: For pushing Thanksgiving a week earlier so we can celebrate Christ a little bit sooner with rife consumerism. Joy to the American World, right?

 
 

Before I begin with my main topic, an update on sports:
Whatever happened to defense in basketball?
The answer to this question is, of course, the NBA. It seems that at some point, someone decided that they would sell more NBA tickets if teams did away with defense entirely during the regular season and made it only optional in playoffs. Ironically, this year NBA ratings have sunk to an all time low and 53% of people polled on the Dan Patrick Show said that the NBA (as compared to the NHL, NFL, MLB and College B-ball and hoops) has the most boring regular season of any sport. Check this out--the MLB came in with 24% of the votes, making the NBA twice as boring as a sport where going 1/3 consistently means you are a superstar. Imagine if LeBron James hit 33% of his shots and everyone hailed him as the MVP. I guess the only explanation for this disparity between the NBA and MLB ratings is that baseball still holds the trump card of being a safe haven for people who enjoy spitting frequently in public all the while wearing very tight pants.
You will notice that I did not get to my main topic at all. This does not bother me in the least as it gives me material for the future.
Cheers.

 
The Beginning 11/20/2008
 

Greetings all (one of you). I have decided to re-enter the world of blogging ever since my retirement from the blogosphere in 9th grade (arguably the pinnacle of my philosophic career) to throw my musings into the milieu of cyberspace journalism. No, I did not look up "milieu" in Merriam-Webster, although I did look up "journalism" to make sure I am using it correctly which, as a matter of fact, I am according to definition 2 c: "Writing designed to appeal to current popular taste or public interest." I realize this is an insult to you, the populous, through the implication that my writing appeals to your taste. For this, and many other humiliations you have suffered in your yuppie existence, I apologize.
::Insert pithy segue here::
Up to this point, I have no particular area of interest on which I would like to focus except the topic of "Things I Think Up During My 30 Minute Lunchbreak at Work." Thus, you are probably predicting at this point that my blog shall have a lifespan of approximately 2 weeks and 3 posts, and you (yes, all one of you) are almost certainly correct. Hopefully, however, I shall be able to maintain a minimal interest through gimmicks and your boredom, if not my sensational writing ability.

Cheers.